I have very much liked the books I’ve read by Alice Peterson, and since I started reading her novels over a decade ago, I decided it was time to re-read some of them. I first came across her through the ‘Bookbag’ site; they sent me ‘You, Me and Him’ back in 2007. I very much enjoyed it when I read and reviewed it then, and I liked it just as much on re-reading this week.
The story is about a couple called Finn and Josie, told in the first person by Josie herself. There are some forays into the past, recounting their first meeting and some of Josie’s other activities ten or more years earlier than the main narrative. There are no dates given, and I did find it a tad confusing once or twice, until I noticed that the main narrative is in the present tense, the past in - unsurprisingly - the past.
Finn and Josie have a son called George, who has been diagnosed with ADHD. The author evidently did her research well; George is not a very active ‘normal’ child; nor is he a toddler; George is six years old. Every day is a struggle, as he fights everything, forgets what he is supposed to do, and becomes constantly distracted. He is able to focus well on things that interest him, but he has to take Ritalin to get through a day at school.
George is beginning to be aware that he is a ‘difficult’ child, but he has no way of controlling his actions. He has no friends at school and is teased, sometimes bullied by boys in his class. His teacher is not very sympathetic, although the school Head is kind, understanding and helpful.
But the ‘him’ of the title isn’t George; it’s another adult, known as Clarky. He has been Josie’s best friend since they were children, and she treats him like a close and much-loved brother. Every time there’s a problem, she runs to Clarky. And when she discovers, to her dismay, that she is pregnant again she tells Clarky before she tells her husband… and Finn is not impressed.
The book is partly about George taking the first few steps towards succeeding in something, and having short periods when things go well for him. It’s partly about Josie gradually coming to terms with the thought of another child. She loves George, of course, but isn’t sure that she could deal with a second child with ADHD.
It’s also about Josie beginning to see more clearly that, while she treats Clarky as a brother, he has stronger feelings for her and would like something more. Clarky is always there for her; Finn is a doctor, and works hard so he is often late home, and has missed some important events in George’s life. Clarky is George’s godfather and takes an active part in their life, but he and Finn have never really hit it off, and there’s a lot of jealousy on both sides. Then Clarky meets someone too…
The stresses experienced by Josie felt very real to me. She has to balance her work life, with a perfectionist and demanding boss, with the necessity of having to be on call in case something goes wrong at school. She’s tired, she’s fed up of being the only person to have to deal with all the day-to-day struggles, which are exhausting and draining. And she’s worried that Finn might like one of his work colleagues rather too much.
Finn and Josie’s arguments flare over minor issues, or one of them not listening to the other. There’s a secret in Josie’s past, too, which Finn doesn’t know about, and that’s quite stressful for her. I was hoping they would sort things out, but as it’s thirteen years since I read the book, I had totally forgotten the outcome.
The writing is excellent, the conversations believable, and Josie, at least, felt all too real. I liked George very much, too. He's not a caricatured 'naughty' child, but an intelligent, loving boy whose brain doesn't function in the same way as those around him. I found Clarky more three-dimensional than Finn, who I didn’t find entirely realistic; the doctor image doesn’t quite fit, in my mind, with the Finn who is presented in his university years, studying medicine but living an extremely unhealthy lifestyle. And I neither liked nor really believed in Finn’s mother, although his Granny is delightful.
I thought it an excellent novel, in introducing an ordinary family with an extraordinary son. The author presents his problems sympathetically, without glossing over the enormous toll taken on parents in this situation. And it’s a good story, too. Definitely recommended if you enjoy women’s fiction with some depth. No longer in print, but inexpensively available for the Kindle.
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