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As with the other books by this author, the most interesting parts - to me - are the anecdotes about his family. He writes well, and I could almost imagine his wife and some of his children. This book was started as a result of his wife starting to question his love for her, and there are some heartfelt, honest descriptions of ways in which he realised that he wasn’t being loving, or at least wasn’t expressing his love. I found these sections of the book quite moving, and also challenging.
While considering what love really is, Paul E Miller turned to the Bible. That’s reasonable enough; he’s writing for a Christian audience, and he naturally wanted to check original source material to find God’s blueprint for love. And, also unsurprisingly, he decided to do an in-depth study of the way Jesus expressed love, as recorded in the Gospels.
Some of what he discovers is insightful and interesting, and he relates it, in places, to his relationship with his wife and children. I found that encouraging and inspiring. But as the book progresses, it becomes more and more a basic Bible study looking at the life of Jesus. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. The author writes well, and makes his points with authority and conviction. However it’s all fairly basic, standard theology, which doesn’t say anything that I hadn’t heard many times before.
By the time I was around half way through I found myself skimming more and more. I know theology is more important than anecdotes, but for someone who has heard the Christian message hundreds of times, it doesn’t offer anything new. I was quite disappointed to find that in the final few chapters there were almost no digressions into what the author learned from his studies or how he applied his knowledge; instead there’s a straightforward gospel message about salvation and resurrection.
I don’t wish to downplay that message: it’s very important, and demonstrates the tremendous love that Jesus had (and has) for us all. But none of us is going to be called on to love in that kind of way, so it felt as if this section was added on rather than being relevant to the reason for the book, or the author’s discoveries.
It’s a well-written book, with some good points. But I didn’t find it nearly as inspiring or interesting as the others I read. And I’m not sure who the intended audience is - in the early chapters it appears to be for mature (or at least long-term) Christian believers hoping to learn to love their spouses and other family members in better ways. By the end it appears to be an evangelistic message for unbelievers.
Review copyright 2020 Sue's Book Reviews
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